Rejected as a spinning instructor

I know, I always blog on the weekend but its really been hard for me to write this week. I have been so excited about becoming a spinning instructor, I knew it was my fate. Well quess what? It isnt. Everything went so well and I have been fantasizing about my course and seeing myself in the instructor bike. 

They called me last Friday and informed me that I was soooo close to making it. "Well close isnt good enough in my world" We really liked you but you didnt make it all they way. My first thought, was  ".... them" But mature as I am I responded like a grown up. "Oh my, I was hoping so much" before I could continue sounding all grown up, they asked me if I wanted to do a spinning course and work on my techniques and holding my beat. Im like ... hell yes. (And again, I didnt actually use those words) 

I cant honestly give up knowing that they "think" I cant hold my beat? I am glad they wanted me so much that they put me in a couse, but I feel rejected and kinda failed. Its hard to tell the whole world, I am not good enough. Actually I hate it.

I have had a few days to think about the outcome, and I truley beleive that everything happens for a reason. It wasnt meant to be at this moment. Maybe someone or something is helping me stay focused on this years most important goal? Ironman Kalmar 2014 I am ready to rock..:-)

Well at least I still love spinning, last weekends 3 hour session

Maddes armpit.. 

Not as cool as I thought

The only time I eat snickers and enjoy it.